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 KERMIT’S
FINGER/DISCO LEPERS split (Poorest
Quality Records/No
Front Teeth Records) To review this bad boy, I had to dig deeply into
the depths of the closet that runs beneath the stairs, haul out, and hook
up my record player while praying it still worked. Lucky for me, it did.
Since Kermit’s Finger hails from Boston, I’ll start with these veteran
drunk punkers. Cranking out six songs in approx seven minutes, “Take
Your Shot” requests someone out there do so at President Bush; sung by
Evil Eddie C, he sho’ sounds angry! Only these guys could follow up such
an explosive political statement with a song, “Drink Drank Drunk,”
about being so shitty and unable to feel your face. This tune has a hook
so damn catchy; it just may be punk rock’s best. “Wanna Be” is self
explanatory, while someone’s anti Asian personal ad annoyed Ross Clot so
much it forced him to turn it into a song, “No Rice.” Evil Ed gets
mean again in “Nothing Left Alive,” which frightens me. “Don’t
Peddle (On Me) targets high priced punkers who contradict themselves. In
an adventuresome, uncharacteristic move, “Don’t Peddle (On Me)” and
“”Wanna Be” includes horns and while you may scratch your head at
this, it really works! From across the pond come The Disco Lepers, who
play punk so fast I honestly checked my record player’s speed setting to
make sure it was correct. The speed of the songs makes The Ramones’
“Warthog” sound like The Carpenters. Eight songs in approx seven
minutes is the reason why I have absolutely no idea what the lyrics are,
but with song titles “Hepatitis Holiday Inn,” Puke on the Youth,”
Nazi Pop,” Feces Party,” and “Stab You in the Back” you can only
imagine the wonderment! Best thing about these guys is the fast paced
music and unintelligible lyrics because I, or you, can make up the lyrics
and make all the songs about me. The 7 inch, both sides, is a winner, it
is. Hmmm, since there are two sides to a 7 inch, does that make it 14
inches? – Denis Sheehan
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