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SEVERE INJURIES
(Sub Rosa) 2003.  Horror/comedy.  70 minutes.  Rated 17.  Our cast of characters includes the requisite good looking, slutty, stupid, and mean college coeds who match up with the arrogant, sexist, and equally stupid/mean frat boys.  On top of that (can you guess) there’s the not so hot but smart outcast girl and guy (bet you didn’t see that coming).  Then we have our killer-wanna-be, Melvin; a ne’er do well bad guy from a long line of failed killers.  Try as they might not one of his ancestors was able to complete a killing (tsk tsk), thus the title.  Can Melvin succeed where his family members failed? 
       Director/star Amy Lynn Best obviously sees the humor in horror; if you’re actually scared by horror movies then Severe Injuries is NOT for you.  Who is this movie made for?  It’s made for those of us who laugh at just how over-the-top fright flicks can be; it’s made for people who realize that the Friday the 13th and Halloween series are comedies dressed up for trick or treating.  It’s made for people who root for the bogeyman in the movies because the regular people are so f#$%ing stupid and annoying.  Are you one of the folks that this film is making fun of?  On to the lightning round: may I please see another movie featuring Lilith Stabs, Debbie Rochon, and Jasi Cotton Lanier?  Wait a minute…could it be…yes!  There’s a bonus short film “Were-Grrl” and all three are in it!  Whoo-hoo!  When I started watching “Severe Injuries” I braced myself for a really awful amateur outing; not only did I wind up laughing out loud I’m looking forward to watching it again with my friends.  Hot chicks, horror, humor, and a director who’s in the know.  Oh yeah!  One scene I especially got a kick out of was when a rather effeminate frat boy gave a lesson on how-to-survive-chick-flicks.  – Dan Inger

 

 

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